Confident Self-Talk

Stop Booing Yourself

I recently signed up for Threads.  It’s a social media app owned by Meta and designed like Twitter, but without the toxicity.  It’s funny because the last thing I thought I’d ever do was sign up for another social media app, but I like it because I don’t have that many followers.  I just post randomly, and it feels like I’m yelling into an empty room.  Anyway, today I saw a thread that said, “Stop booing yourself off stage before people ever get a chance to see you perform.”

That hit me like a ton of bricks, and I immediately started to self-reflect.  I can remember a time when I would have a great idea or goal, and nothing anyone said or did could keep me from making that goal or idea a reality.  However, after many rejections, perceived failures, and the everyday pressures and responsibilities of life, I have begun to do just what the aforementioned thread admonishes us not to do.  I figuratively boo myself off stage.

The boldness and confidence that I once had in my late teens and early twenties has all but vanished, and now that I have been honest enough with myself to admit where I am, I am making the intentional steps to regain the confidence of my youth.

Here are the steps I am taking to do so:

1. I am practicing intentional positive self-talk. In The GSD Factor, Misha talks about your voice being your strongest weapon.  Well, I have chosen to use that weapon on my own self-limiting thoughts.  Any time I feel self-doubt or insecurity about something, I intentionally activate my faith and quote one of my favorite scriptures, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”  That small practice helps me overcome those limiting thoughts and get that much closer to success.
2. I remind myself of a time when I have accomplished a challenging task.  Sometimes I forget all the things I have accomplished, and I’ve found that if I take a moment to remember the mental space I was in at the time, it helps me to readjust my present thinking to match the level of confidence needed to complete the task or goal at hand.
3. Finally, I make a concentrated effort to research someone who has done something similar to what I’m trying to do.  I truly believe that there is nothing new under the sun, and even though I may have some new take on an idea or project, chances are there are several people who have done something similar.  I find those people, and I say, “If they can do it, so can I.”  I have to be careful that I don’t fall into comparison when I do this, but most of the time, I can avoid it if I’m being intentional.

These are the steps that work for me.  Some days are harder than others, but with each opportunity that becomes available to me, I get closer and closer to the confidence I once had.

If you are also struggling with a loss of confidence and fearlessness, I challenge you to think of intentional ways in which you can combat those feelings of fear and inadequacy and recalibrate your thoughts to remember your greatness.  No more booing!  Get on that proverbial stage and leave it all out there!